We're all made out of ship wrecks
by Suicidal.Ballet
Summary: Draco smiles at me and this time I can't hold back, I smile back at him even though it feels wrong... Like he's trouble about to happen. WARNING This has sex, drugs, and eating disorders in it.
1. Chapter 1

I sighed gently as I looked down at my daughter Adabella who was sound asleep in my arms. Her bright strawberry blonde hair sticking up everywhere, I smiled down at her I picked up her tiny fist and looked at nails musing that I needed to cut them.

I gently moved her up, so I could lay her down upon my chest.

I start thinking aloud to myself: "It's been quite a long year." I closed my eyes and gently drifted off to sleep. Thinking of my past...

As I think about my past the one thing that always stood out... my weight. As a child growing up with six brothers I was always picked on by someone and my weight was always a target.

But even so, for as long as I could remember I was constantly picked on for my weight since my first year at Hogwarts, but everything changed mid-way through my fifth year.

I was walking down the hall to get to my common room, to the seclusion of the girls dormitory, where I can go crawl into bed and ignore the world outside.

"Ah, look it's the Fat Weasel." Pansy Parkinson sneered at me as I walked past her, her little group of friends started to laugh. But I held my head high and ignored the mocking laughter around me as I looked at the sneering brown head staring at me with nothing but contempt.

"What do you want Parkinson?" I snap.

"Don't you think those clothes are too tight?" she asked while laughing. There was nothing pleasant about her laugh... It was an act of show to degrade me in front of others. I frowned and looked down at what I was wearing, a pair of gray skinny jeans with a gray and white tank top. Muggle items, but clothing none the less.

"No, I think it looks fine." I reply before walking away from her group of tagalongs.

I know I'm not the skinniest nor am I the prettiest girl at Hogwarts, but I also know I'm not ugly. I have long red hair which cascades freely down my back and light brown eyes like cocoa, with a light layer of freckles dusted across my nose and cheeks, I mused to myself while walking down the hallway and turning left.

I'm not considered fat, but I do see myself as a curvy women, and mostly everyone always whispered about my weight behind my back; when they thought I didn't hear them. At first I didn't care, but now it was beginning to get to me. Curves are meant to be adored. Girls usually envy other girls who are fortunate enough to show a little hourglass figure. So why is it that nobody acknowledges me?

I walked down the hallway and saw Hannah Abbot, she smiled at me and slipped something into my hand giving me a discrete wink before walking away. I rolled my eyes before walking into the common room and slipping up into my bedroom, casting a quick silencing spell around my four poster bed and drawing the curtains shut.

_Ginny,_

Take these pills, they will help you lose weight a lot faster than just working out alone. They're muggle so read the box before you take them. I've taken them and I've lost 30 pounds already!

_- Hannah_

I sigh looking down at the box. "Take two every morning, lunch, and dinner." I whispered to myself.

I got out of my bed before heading to the bathroom connected with our rooms. I made sure the door was locked before turning around and looking at myself fully in the mirror. I frowned at myself before checking out my body. My arms are too big, I look like I have thunder thighs, my cheeks are too fat, I mused to myself before looking myself in the eye.

I thought about what decisions I had to make while leaning against the bathroom sink with the pills in hand, the capsules inside the small container rattling each time I turn it upside-down... I could take them I thought to myself. "Oh what's the worst thing that could happen to me? I'll lose weight?" I said aloud and it sounded almost certain for me to go ahead and swallow a capsule. I grabbed a glass of ice water and swallowed the pill one after the other. I was nervous about taking them but I settled on taking two. What's the worse that could go wrong?

I rolled my eyes and got up to go for a walk, something I've been doing since the first year I came here. I pulled on a pair of black yoga pants with a matching black tank top before heading down to the lake to go for a walk.

xXx

I sighed while looking down at my arm, the Dark Mark sticking out like a sore thumb, contrasting heavily against the alabaster of my skin to which then I blanched. I sigh before tugging down the sleeve to my sweater making sure it covered my arm fully before walking over to my dresser. I dug into the neatly stacked items of clothing and reached for the small sachet which contained a powdery substance inside. I pulled out the white drug before going to the little table that stood in the middle of my room.

I cut open the plastic bag with a small pocket knife and emptied the contents onto the glass surface. I used a razor to divide the power into four equal lines of long rectangles, taking the straw which I made out with a paper bill (a trick which I learned from the muggle suppliers of the so called drug). Bringing my face closer and using my index finger to block one of my nasal passages as I used the bill and snorted the powder forcing me to instantly shut my eyes at the sudden sensation. I felt my body go numb and my problems disappear. I smiled as I snorted three more lines of coke making me feel like I was on the top of the world.

I pop into my mouth two tablets known by their street name as ecstasy. "The day the Great Draco Malfoy turns to muggle drugs to escape reality." I laugh to myself before having to lie down from the whirling view of my vision smearing.

My thoughts start to race and I know I can't lay down anymore. My heart begins to beat painfully. I sighed before throwing on a pair of running shoes and exit through the door.

When I got down to the lake I saw her, Ginny Weasley. Her red hair flying in the wind like a sprinting horse as she ran around the lake. I joined her and before I knew it we were running, running side by side, running together. It seemed like we never stopped running until my companion paused to take a breath before looking me in the eyes.

I started to run, I don't know where I got this burst of energy. It feels amazing I mused to myself

xXx

"These pills must really work then." I said out loud while I started to run faster. The harsh wind of the night whipping across my face and I inhaled sharply with an uplifting smile. The next thing I knew Draco Malfoy, the vain of my existence, the vain of my whole families existence starts running next to me.

We ran together not uttering a single word. By the third lap I'm very much out of breath and I have to stop running to catch it. I look up to see Draco looking down at me his pupils very much dilated and looking at me in wonder, I look back at him before he cracks me a huge smile. His sudden change in attitude towards me scares me a little.

I sneer at him before questioning him "What's wrong with you Malfoy?" I bite out, I came down here to go for a walk… Well rather a run but I didn't want him to come down here and toy with me for wanting to lose weight.

"Nothing red, ready to go running again?" He asked with a smile still lingering on his face.

"Sure?" It sounded more like a question than I would have liked but he didn't seem to mind.

I don't even know why I am running with him, he is nothing but a rude ferret to my family; but for some reason my body told me to run with him..

We start running again, this time not stopping until we ran around the lake seven times. I was at loss of breath and I figured the blonde next to me jogging was to, but neither of us complained.

Draco smiles at me and this time I can't hold back, I smile back at him even though it feels wrong... Like he's trouble about to happen.

xXx

It feels so good to run, I thought to myself while we ran around the lake this being our tenth lap. I looked down at the strange little girl next to me, she's short I muse to myself. Her red hair trapped within the strong winds, her cheeks flushed red from the cold biting at her skin. "I bet she has soft skin." I notice I've said that out loud instead of whispering it in my head, but she doesn't answer. I feel like these drugs might have messed me up a little more than I thought, but I wasn't thinking clearly then, I just wanted to run with her.

We stop after another lap around the lake. She falls down and I follow suit.

I smile at her and she smiles back at me, showing off her perfect white teeth. I find it attractive. I was sure by now that the drugs were taking their effects, because I was beginning to consider Weasley here as somewhat appealing. However, I conclude I like the way she smiles at me, I thought to myself. She looks so pretty right now, panting for breath, her cheeks stained red with sweat clinging to her body.

"Do you want to come with me?" I question her. She closes her eyes and inhales in the ice cold air before nodding her head. She looks at me then laughs. I smile at her laugh, it sounds like music to me.

We start making our way up towards the school. She looks at me with a curious look on her face and bites her bottom lip. I start to feel a warm feeling sit in my chest and she looks down at my hand before looking up at me. She smiles at me and before I can stop myself I grab her hand wrapping it in my own. I nearly moan at how soft her hands feel. We walk down the long hallways of Hogwarts and I lead her towards my dorm, muttering the password and tugging her into my private chambers. The benefits of being Head Boy is you get your own private room.

The room remains the same state I left it, the scattering of leftover powder spread in tiny dusting around the table and I sigh, the room is a mess, clothes everywhere. Although clothes are the least of my worries. Ginny looks up at me and then at the drugs. She sends me an encouraging but scared smile and I take the hint as I pull her down to the table and hand her the paper bill straw.

xXx

I look at him and then the drugs. I know these are drugs. Hermione and I researched the good and bad medications surrounding the muggle community. She warned me specially not to take the drugs which looked the same as the ones Draco had laid out on the glass table. I must be crazy I think to myself as I look at the straw and the white powder remaining on the table.

I knew I shouldn't have gone with him, I knew I should have escaped before he had the chance to manipulate me. So many thoughts were running through my head at the time to deny my actions. I know I'm tired of being known as the fat one, the ugly one, the one who isn't good enough...

As those thoughts swim in my mind I take the straw down before snorting a line, surprised at myself for being to fluent with handling a straw which I've never tried before.

I don't know what over came me to allow Draco to join alongside my running session, or to smile at him or to even let him hold my hand while we walked to his room... His room. I'm in bloody Draco Malfoy's private chambers I think to myself. I wonder how many girls he's had up in here before me. Hundreds I assume…

All the concerns seemed to empty out of my mind when I snorted a couple more lines and Draco gave me pills to pop into my mouth, nothing seemed to matter from then on.

I looked over at Draco, staring into his granite eyes, an ignition of fire burning deep in side of me. He must have felt it too because next thing I knew our clothes were off. The rest of the next came to me as a blur.

xXx

I took the opportunity before she jumped on me and managed to pull off my shirt exposing my bare chest and lean torso before I took control. Hauling the delectable redhead over to me, my teeth nibbled on her exposed neck, sucking the area which I had just bitten and began swirling my tongue over the deep red mark now located there. Her finger nails were scratching at my back and my skin started to burn at the contact .

I never stopped to think of the ugly mark that sat my skin and how she would react to it.

Her skin feels like silk, just like I thought she would feel. I close up on her face and crash my lips onto hers, my tongue demeaning for entrance as my fingers worked on yanking off her tank top leaving her in a green bra, I growl before attacking her chest. I heard her hiss before moaning. I nearly came undone at that, her sighs of pleasure never sounded so sweet.

The way that she's moaning is a little overwhelming and my body instantly begins to react to her touch. I lift her up and wrap her legs around my waist as I carry her over to my bed, laying her down onto the mattress before falling on top of her. Multitasking in touching her exposed skin I manage to yank off my pants which was rubbing painfully against my erection, leaving me in just my silk boxers. Ginny stifled a giggle at the sight of me naked and I lift my head to see her openly lying there for me to indulge in, her hair sprawled like a fiery halo. She was truly magnificent.

I move things along and use my fingers to slide down the blasted yoga pants she had on and leaving her with nothing but a pair of green matching underwear set. The green matched the same shade of Slytherin. I smirked at that. I start kissing her while unclasping her bra. Throwing the flimsy item of clothing carelessly onto the floor I slowly move down from her neck to the valleys of her naked chest and take into my mouth a rosy nipple. Ginny arches into a curve and releases a pleasure filled sigh.

xXx

He was everywhere at once, it felt so good. I've never experienced intense pleasure pushing me to the extremes and over the edge. I could barely think properly because a certain blonde was stealing my concentration.

I look down at Draco who was sucking and softly biting my nipples. He was so engrossed with his task it made me smirk. Everything felt so good right now... And I wasn't so sure it was just the drugs making me think this.

After spending a generous amount of time engulfing on my breasts, Draco finally moved on from his task and shifted lower to slip his fingers into the hem of my panties and took a painstakingly long time to slide them off of my legs. His eyes remained glued to mine and he looked like a fallen angel, his fringe falling to cover his eyebrows and bits of his eyes. I licked my lips in anticipation.

Once my panties were pulled off he settled himself in between my thighs while softly thrusting his hips against mine. I gasped at the feel of his obvious arousal grind against my center.

Draco slowly slid off his boxers freeing his swollen member before he got into the position to enter me. He slowly slide into me, moaning and whispering that I was tight, too tight. I couldn't speak and instead my bottom lip was trapped between my teeth and I tried not to scream. He was big. Too big for his own good.

Everything felt good, my whole body felt like it was fire, his touch was so demanding and everywhere at once.

He trusted into me in a rocking motion, with fluid motion and his head tucked in the crook of my neck. I felt the warmth inside of my body building up untill I reached my peak and before I knew it I saw fireworks while screaming out Draco's name. I felt him tighten inside of me before filling me with his warm seed.

He slumped on top of me before rolling us over and my head resting on his chest and shut my eyes to the world.

xXx

I held her close to me, my arm wrapped around her naked shoulder. Her skin felt so soft against my calloused fingers. Pulling her closer to me I close my eyes trying to catch sleep when Ginny's breath becomes more even and I know she's asleep.

I close my eyes and soon I'm deep into a dream where I don't want to be. I'm standing in the same place where I first received my Dark Mark. I don't want to see this, but it plays out anyways. I feel like I'm trapped inside a nightmare and no one to pull me out. I'm desperately clawing my fingers and chest at the overcloud of darkness above me.

xxx

It's dark and cold down here, it smells damp and a little like blood.

I swallow while looking down at the ground and close my eyes, trying to swallow the bile which remained at the back of my throat. I'm nervous, I don't want to be here.

I hear a hissing sound and look up to see Nagini, she's staring at me... Like she's trying to view my soul. I swallow again before looking back down at the ground so she can't read my thoughts. I hear footsteps, the dire wait to when my Lord calls my name.

"Ah, Draco Malfoy." A sinister hiss forces me to lift my head and I find I'm staring into the red slit eyes of Voldemort.

xxx

I wake up with a gasp. I feel a warm body next to mine. My head is pounding and I am not thinking straight so I assume it's Pansy.. It always is.

I push the body away from me before walking to my dresser and grabbing two white pills to help ease the ache in my head. I hear the sheets move and I turn around expecting to find Pansy.

Ginny Weasley was certainly not what I was expecting.

"Oh shit."


	2. Chapter 2

"Oh shit."

I wake up hot and sweaty. It smelled like sex and other things I couldn't identify at the time.

My stomach turned as I slowly got up and wrapped the sheets around my body a little tighter. I wrack my memory for some sort of clue as to what happened. I rub my face as I think back of yesterday.

I got the pills from Hannah, I went for a run... And Draco... I pop up my head and see Draco looking at me like I was from another planet.

"Oh shit is correct." he said before walking into another room, I assume it's the bathroom when I hear water start to run.

I get up slowly, stretching out my limbs before looking for my clothing. "Fucking wonderful." My tank top is ripped. Everything is annoying me right now and the pounding in my head isn't helping anything. I slip back into my yoga pants and bra before grabbing the sheet and pulling it around my upper half waiting for Draco to get out of the shower.

I rub my face again as I try to think about last night. I know we had sex, and I know we did drugs..

"Oh fuck, Ron is going to kill me."

The water turns off a few minutes later and Draco steps back into the room with black skinny jeans and a V-neck.. Muggle clothing, I wonder what else he does Muggle now I think to myself, as he walks around the room.

"You ripped my tank top." I say as quietly as possible. Everything is hurting my head right now and I don't want the ache to get any worse.

He grunts in response before throwing a over sized hoodie at me. I growl

"Look Weasel, this never happened okay? I will fucking kill you if you say anything to anyone. You fucking understand?" He said looking me dead in the eye. I roll my eyes but jerk my head up and down anyways.

"It's not like I would want people to know I actually slept with you." I snap back while grabbing the hoodie to throw it over my head.

Once i'm dressed I grab my shoes and walk to the door as fast as I can. This is just a huge mistake I keep repeating to myself as I walk down the hallway.

xXx

I clean my room up as fast as I can, thinking of the ways I could hide everything I have in the dresser and closet. I don't trust her, she could ruin everything just by opening her fucking mouth.

I'm pissed with myself for actually sleeping with her and giving her drugs. I don't know what I was thinking, giving the golden girl drugs... Oh that's right I wasn't thinking I growl at myself.

After everything is clean I go to find Pansy, maybe she could fix this.

As I walk down the hallway I start to think of what happened again last night. Ginny wanted the drugs but that's all I could really remember... Everything else is just a blur now. I run my hands through my hair and try to calm down.

I will fucking go through with my threat if she doesn't fucking keep her mouth shut I remind myself as I walk into the common room to find Pansy.

xXx

As soon as i'm in my room I throw off the hoodie and put it under my bed, I don't want any reminders of what happened last night.

I grab a fresh pair of clothes and go to the showers, I need to wash off. Scrub away any reminders of the acts that occurred last night, make myself feel clean again. I remember to grab my wand on the way out of the door.

I do a quick spell to make sure I don't get pregnant after last night... Because i'm pretty sure he didn't wear a condom. Better do a protection spell against S. as well.

I take my time in the shower, making sure to scrub every inch of my body clean. After I get done with the shower I take my time to brush my teeth until my gums are red and raw, but for some reason I could still taste him.

I get dressed in a pair of gray skinny jeans and a tank top with a hoodie, my hoodie not the one under my bed I think to myself.

I go back to my bed and remember the pills I got from Hannah yesterday, I pull out the box and pop two in my mouth taking them dry, I gag a little. I lay down in bed playing with the box my mind drifting everywhere. After awhile I get the urge to move around again... I like these pills, they make me never want to sit down I muse to myself while grabbing a pair of flip flops.

I start to walk around Hogwarts, taking in the pictures before moving on outside. The air is like ice, it feels great to my lungs. I walk around for around two hours before Harry and Ron find me.

"Hey Gin." Ron says while messing with my hair... I don't know why he does that, I don't even understand why he's talking to me. He never actually talks to me unless he wants something from me. I glare at him until he stops touching me.

"Well listen, Ron can you give us a minute?" Harry ask while rubbing the back of his neck. This isn't going to be good... Harry has this insane idea that we could date if I lost weight. I'm sure it's going to be one of those talks.

Ron walks away and Harry turns to me. "Listen Gin I wanted to talk to you abo-." "Save it Harry, I don't want to hear it." I cut him off before walking away from him. I don't want to deal with him right now, I don't want to deal with anyone.

I walk around until dinner. I need to eat I think to myself so I go down to the great hall and sit with Dean, my first real ever boyfriend. He used me for sex but I like to think he actually cared at one point.

There is a lot of different foods to pick from but nothing actually looks good so I just get a glass of water and wait until I become hungry.

"Are you alright Gin? A Weasley not eating?" Dean jokes, I crack a weak smile at him and tell him I just don't really feel good.

I sip on my water and talk with everyone for a few moments before I feel a pair of eyes on me, I look around for a few seconds before landing on Draco Malfoy. He smirks at me before raising his glass to me as a mock toast. I sneer at him before turning back to Dean.

"Actually, i'm going to go lay down, not feeling to good right now." I say to anyone who is listening and leave the table.

As i'm walking down the hallway I get pulled into a classroom. I turn around and see a glaring Malfoy staring at me.

"Did you tell anyone?" He growls at me. I laugh softly before responding. "No, I told you I wouldn't so leave me the fuck alone." I go to turn around but before I can he grabs my wrist and yanks me close to his body.

"Listen little girl, I don't know what game you think you're playing but I can and will ruin your whole life, don't fuck with me." he whispered in my ear. I look up to see his dark gray eyes glaring. I roll my eyes and try to pull away from him, but he wasn't letting go.

"Let me go Malfoy." I say meanly. I'm tired and i've had a headache all day... I just want to go to bed and have this day over with.

He sneers at me before letting of my wrist. I run out of the classroom until I drop down on my bed.

My heart is racing and my thoughts are going crazy. I sit up and try to focus on my breathing, easier said than done I think to myself.

After a while my breathing becomes normal and i'm finally able to lay down, i'm not sure when but I was finally able to sleep.

I open my eyes and look around my bed, it's still dark out and the girl next to me is snoring, I sneer at her through the darkness. I check the time on the muggle alarm clock my dad gave me last year for my birthday. 3:45 shines back at me.

I sigh before running my fingers through my hair, I feel gross... I grab a pair of muggle jeans and a tank top before going to the shower. It's sunday so I don't have to worry about classes right now.

I lock the door to the bathroom before turning around and looking at myself in the mirror, it's only been two days but I see a difference in my body.

I take off the hoodie and skinny jeans before staring at myself, my stomach looks smaller... Not by much but smaller non the less.

I take off my bra and boyshorts before hopping in the shower, since it's early in the morning I take my time and make sure I scrub every inch of my body. When i'm done in the shower I get dressed before walking back to my bedroom.

I grab a hoodie and a pair of flats before grabbing the box of pills, I sneer at the box before popping two in my mouth.

I walk down to the common room, it's empty but it's not really a surprise, it's still early.

I leave the common room and go down to the great hall... It's early but I should be able to eat something before the pills hit my system.

I go and sit down while looking around the room, it's basically empty but a few kids and here and there.

I check the time again, it's 4:50 people should be getting up soon.

I grab some water and toast before taking a small bite of it, it makes my stomach turn so I put it down and push the plate away from me before taking a small sip of the water.

I sit for awhile while playing with the glass of water my mind not really focusing on anything.

The next thing I know everyone is sitting down and talking to one another.

Ron comes and sits down next to me his face red.

"Ginny, why are you down here so early?" he questions me. I don't respond but I look at him so he knows I heard him.

Harry comes down a few minutes after sitting on the other side of me. I have to force myself not to roll my eyes as Harry smiles at me.

I don't think he understands that I don't have a girl crush on him anymore, that i'm not that little girl anymore.

Ron starts to stuff his face and it makes my stomach twist. I feel a pair of eyes on me so I look up and see Malfoy staring at me. I sneer at him before getting up. I hope he doesn't pull me into another classroom, it's annoying I muse to myself.

I make it down to the lake before i'm thrown against a tree with warm breath on my neck. I roll my eyes before looking up at the dark gray eyes that have sought me out for the past two days.

"Malfoy, let me go." I snap at him, he just sneers at me before licking his lips.

He bend down before kissing me harsh against the mouth. I don't know why but I kiss him back grinding my hips against his.

"Come with me." he snaps at me before dragging me behind him.


	3. Chapter 3

"Come with me." he snaps at me before dragging me behind him.

Some how we end up back in this bedroom, swallowing the pills dry and snorting the white lines before having sex again.

It's fast this time, there wasn't anything sweet or slow about it, it was hard fast and ruff.

I close my eyes and try to catch my breath, it feels like my heart is racing. I wonder if he's going to tell me not to say anything to anyone.

My heart won't slow down, so I sit up and pull back on my jeans and top before turning and looking at him.

He's staring at me, really staring at me, like he can see into my soul and I don't like it so I stand up to leave.

"Well thanks Malfoy." it sounds strange to my ears. He nods his head before going to the shower. This time I don't wait.

Two months pass with out a problem, he doesn't seek me out. I still took the muggle diet pills, they made a huge change in my body. I used to be short and chubby but now you could see my hipbones clearly.

I wake up feeling hot and sweaty, i'm craving the drugs Draco gave me two months ago. I shake my head clear of those thoughts and go to take a shower.

When i'm done the mirrors are steamed up and it smells like cherries thanks to my shampoo.

I wipe the mirror clean to look at myself, I almost doesn't recognize the person staring back at me. My hipbones are sticking out, my collar bones are clear under my skin, you can see my ribs with crystal clearly.

I smile at myself. This is what everyone wanted, this is what I wanted I remind myself as I get dressed.

I make sure to pop the muggle diet pills in my mouth before going down to the common room. As I walk down I noticed that everyone is down there, they all stop and look at me. I hold my head up high anyways, as I walk out of the room I hear whispers about me.

My clothes doesn't fit me anymore, the skirt is falling off my hipbones and the shirt is down to my thighs.

I sit at the table before getting a glass of water.

It's different now, i'm different, i'm not the same little girl who everyone made fun of. I make a sip of my water before hearing a crack of thunder

the sky is black, like it's about to storm. It makes me think of when I was little and my dad would take me outside and we would watch as the world cried, or at lease that's what my younger self thought.

I'm lost in my own world until Harry comes up to me, he asks me out, I can see the hope in his eyes, the longing. I don't want to say yes, but everyone is watching me.

I feel a pair of gray eyes on me. I don't look at Harry while I say yes, I look at the gray eyes.

A week little I break up with Harry, he had a hickey on his neck, it's not as if I cared because I didn't.

Ron and Harry stop talking for a week before becoming best friends again, I didn't think anything different would happen.

Finally we're aloud to leave Hogwarts and go shopping. I don't go with anyone, I don't see the point in it.

I walk around not really looking for anything or anyone. I feel someone grab my arm, I know who it is, his hands are hard and he always smells fresh and clean.

"Where are we going?" I question him, but he doesn't answer.

He pulls me into a clothing store and a woman rushes at us, eying my hair and freckles before asking Draco what he needs. He tells her I need clothing, everything, and to put it on his card before leaving.

I'm left standing there with the woman who's name tag read Maggie.

She ask me my sizes and I tell her that I wore a M in tops and 8 in pants. She clicks her tongue before measuring me.

I'm now a size 00 and a xx-small in tops. It feels weird to know that i'm that tiny.

Since it's going on Draco's card she goes all out, and after three hours she tells me that everything is already going to been sent to my dorm. Before I leave she lets me wear my new clothes, dark blue shorts and a gray tanktop.

When I walk out of the shop i'm grabbed again, he pulls me in another store, tells them to fix my hair before walking out.

They spend in an hour on my hair before i'm ready to go. They cut an inch off of the bottom and give me bangs.

I don't know why i'm letting him spend money on me, I don't know why i'm letting these people I don't know clean me up

After we back to Hogwarts everyone sees the difference, they know i've changed. The trio isn't around, it doesn't really surprise me though, they're never around anymore.

It's a week before he contacts me again, it's a week before he pulls me into a classroom and slams my little body against his.

His breath is warm against my ear, I shiver as I feel him run his hand up and down my back. He doesn't speak, he just lightly sucks on my neck.

This is going to far, I know it is, I just don't care enough to stop it anymore.

It became a habit for us, doing the drugs, fucking, and him buying me gifts.

I know I should feel dirty, I should feel unclean, but I don't.

A month later he surprised everyone by taking my hand and walking me to my classes.

Ron, Harry, and Hermione refuse to talk to me and for some reason i'm okay with that. Draco and I don't really talk, it's mostly the staring, the sex, and the drugs.

He asks me something one day while we're laying under a tree, he's sitting against the tree and i'm laying back in his chest while playing with his fingers.

"Ginny, how did you lose all of the weight?" he asks me, it makes me stop playing with his fingers as I freeze up.

"Muggle pills." I answer before I started to play with his fingers again.

He doesn't bring it up again.

I knew Ron would tell the family that I was different, that I lost all of the weight, that i'm with Draco fucking Malfoy, son of Death Eater, son of the Death Eater who basically handed me my death when I was 12.

So I wasn't shocked when I got a letter from my mother. I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply before reading it

_'Ginny,_

_I cannot understand why you're dating that boy. You're better than that._

_And what's this I hear that you're not eating? You're coming home soon and we will talk._

_Love, Molly.'_

I rolled my eyes before pushing the letter away from me. I need to talk to Ron, I need to tell him that it's okay.

I grab of pair of shorts and a hoodie before throwing on a pair of Toms, they're muggle, I don't understand why Draco would buy me muggle shoes. I laugh to myself as I walk down. I spot Ron right away, he's whispering with Harry. I roll my eyes before walking down and throwing myself on the couch across from them.

"Look guys." I start while staring at my brother, his face is red, it's a interesting color on his face.

"I know you hate Draco, but we're dating so you're going to have to get used to it." I tell them while getting off the couch and walking out of the common room.

I find Draco, I always do. He's eating his food, it's gross so I don't stare at it while I sit next to him playing with his glass of water. It's pretty early and there isn't only two other people there so I sit next to him with out an issue.

"Stop Gin." he tells me as I sigh and move the glass around again. I roll my eyes but don't say anything to me.

I know he's looking at me, trying to tell if i'm just bored or if there's something else going on, I won't let him know right now.

After he's done eating he pulls me up and we walk away, we go down to the lake where we will sit until we have classes.

He pulls me against him and runs his hands up and down on my thighs, he stops when he feels my hipbones.

"Have you been eating?" he ask softly in my ear. I jerk my head side to side to let him know that I in fact have not been eating. I feel his body tighten against mine.

"You need to eat." he tells me before laying me down on top of him in the grass. We must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I know the sun is shining brightly against us and it makes my skin feel like it's on fire.

I get off Draco slowly, he wakes up when he feels my weight move off him. He takes us inside straight into his room and makes me eat, I chew slowly but as soon as the food hits my stomach I gag and throw it up. He rolls his eyes and cleans up the mess before making me try again.

It takes hours before I can finally hold anything down, he clicks his tongue before making me shower. When I come out he throws a shirt at me before showering himself.

I crawl into the bed and as soon as my head hit the pillow the last thing on my mind was how did I let myself get here?


	4. Chapter 4

How did I let myself get here?

Two weeks have passed and Draco has made me eat everyday, it hurt at first, going months with out eating, back to eating everyday. I don't know how I was able to go so long without food.

My shorts and pants become tight and Draco sees this. He rolled his eyes but wrote the shop keeper and told her that I needed new clothing. He asked me what size they were because I needed a size bigger. When I told him he's eyes became hard and started to yell at me.

"Are you trying to fucking kill yourself?" he screams and it scares me, as it shows off clearly on my face. He takes a deep breath and tells me he's sorry but he loves me and wants me to be healthy.

Two weeks later he makes me weigh myself, I am 90 pounds, it's scary to know how tiny I really am.

Everyone is finally getting over the fact that we're a couple, everyone that is but my brother. Ron won't talk to me... He acts like I'm not even alive most of the time, but I am okay with that because when I needed him the most, he walked away.

My family has stopped writing me, the last letter should have broke my heart but i'm starting to assume I don't have one and if I do it beats for Draco.

I roll my eyes before picking up the last letter my mother sent me.

'Ginny,

This is going to be my last attempt to make you see reason, I know you think you are an adult but you are still my child and it is breaking my heart to see you go down this dark road. I am still your mother and I will always love you, but I think somewhere along the line I lost you, my sweet little baby girl, you need help and i'm afraid I can't give you the help you need but we will talk about this when you are home for holiday.

Love Mommy

P.S. Please break up with that death eater's son It is breaking your father's heart.'

I roll my eyes before taking out parchment and a quill before responding.'

'Mother,

It is regrettable that you can't see that I love Draco and although I love you and our family I have decided not to come home for Christmas and the holidays. You are right that I think of myself as an adult as I have made my own choices one being not to come home and see the family and be judged because I love Draco. I am sorry that you feel that you did not do your best with me but you did mother you raised an independent daughter capable of making her own decisions and the courage to stick to those choices. I'm sorry you feel like you have lost me and I guess in a way you have but this is my choice and the help you claim I need, I don't see loving someone as needing help. I'm not broken anymore and I have only Draco to thank for that so if you decide to disown me I am sure I will find a way to deal with that. I will not leave Draco. I am sorry you feel this is a personal affront to you and our family but please be assured it isnt. I am doing what I think is right for me. I feel I need to grow, outside of our family and outside of my brothers. I will always love you but sometimes love is not enough

Ginny'

I go down to the owlery and send the bird off with the letter before going off to find Draco.

I find him in our usual spot, the tree by the lake. He's laying down next to the tree the sun hitting his pale blonde hair, eyes closed. I smile as I walk up to him.

When I get to him I noticed his chest isn't falling up and down as he breathes in air, and that his face is pale. My heart starts to race as I scream before falling down and start pounding him on the chest, begging for him to wake up, after what seemed like a life time (really only minutes) I'm shoved off him and he's carried away from me I watch as Hagrid holds Draco in his arms looking fragile as he follows Madam Pomfrey to the castle. Ron , Harry and Hermione look down at me crying in the grass over Draco. Sobbing so hard I can barely breathe. Ron tells the others to go to the castle without him. He bends down towards me and scoops me up in his arms while i cry the whole time as Ron takes me up to the castle.

"He's going to die." I scream while punching the walls around me, it felt good so I punch everything I can think of while tears stream down my face. The terror inside me and the pain is to close to the surface, I need to do something to keep it from being real.

I'm grabbed by someone who smells and feels familiar. I cry into Ron's chest while screaming "HE'S DYING, DRACO PLEASE, I'M SCARED" over and over again and Ron rocks me like he did when we were small, I can feel him shake while he rocks me but it's out of my mind right now. I can't seem to breathe every gasp feels like a betrayal against Draco, why should I live while he is in their dying?

It feels like years pass before Madam Pomfrey comes out, she tells me the drugs made his heart stop but she was able to save him.

I felt like I could finally breath again and then the pain set in, I scream in pain. Ron holds me as I finally look down at my hands, Madam Pomfrey gasps, they're covered in blood and bruises are starting to form, I guess I punched the walls pretty hard. Which is strange because I didnt feel anything while I was punching them but the blood and bruises prove otherwise.

Ron takes me into one of the back rooms while Madam Pomfrey cast a spell to staunch the blood flow and a sleepless dream potion for my nerves before leaving the room.

My face has dry tear marks mixed with eyeliner and mascara. I think it breaks Ron's heart to see me like this because he grabs me and pulls me into his lap rocking me until I fall asleep, before the potion overtakes me I am reminded of my family, and the love I have for them. Even if I have changed so much they don't recognize me, I will still love them.

I'm not allowed to see Draco, and it breaks my heart a thousand times, I don't think I have stopped crying since the day if found him. I can barely sleep anymore. when I drift off into the land of dreams, I see Draco under the tree, pale and not breathing. Madam Pomfrey tells me to take a spoonful of the dreamless potion to help me get to sleep.

He's not at school, his father took him out and put him in a rehabilitation center that specializes in muggle drugs. that will help him get off of the drugs. The time away from him feels like years instead of days and I briefly think back to how bad I felt when I was getting off the pills and eating food again and I realize it must be so much worse for him.

It's been two weeks since the last time that I have seen him. My thoughts are always of him, always no matter what. The professors are taking it easy on me right now, they know about Draco and I and the situation that has occurred. I think Dumbledore may have mentioned something to them. Even Snape who is usally as vile as his greasy hair was even being generous with the time lines due for assignments.

I was a bit shocked by my brother's actions towards me. Ron's actually been helping me, he's forcing me eat, and sleep by the only way he knows how, by rocking me. After awhile I stop crying and my heart doesn't hurt as much... It's a lie, and everyone knows it but I don't care.

I'm sitting with Ron and Harry when the owls come swooping down with the day's post.

A small box lands on top of the half eaten food that I have been picking at halfheartedly for the last hour.

I open the box and look at the locket and the note that's attached to it.

'My sweet little Ginny,

open this when you're alone and wear it with pride. Our love will last forever.

Love forever and always

Your Draco.'

I pick up the locket and see it's a snake wrapped around a lion, I laugh at it before crying.

It was another two weeks before I saw him again, his hair shorter, bags under his eyes... But he looks perfect, he always did.

I want to run up to him, to hug him, to kiss his lips again, to feel him wrap his arms around me... But I didn't, I held off. I was wary of how he would feel towards me and I'll admit I was a bit scared that maybe while he was in rehab he had grown to hate me since we use to do drugs together.

It was a week before he finally held me again. The tension coiled so tightly in my body releases as he embraces me and I can finally relax and breathe in his scent.

"You're wearing it." he exhales while holding me tight against his body. I smile into his chest. I haven't taken off the locket that he gave since I received it two weeks ago. I decide to tell him this and he smirks in the way he does and my stomach flutters and heart beat quickens.

Things finally turn back to normal a month later. Draco is off the drugs and he's made sure i've stayed off the diet pills.

Everything was actually working out for now. My family is choosing to believe that i'm not actually there anymore, but like I told my mother before i'm fine with that. It is their loss that I am no longer a part of their family, they are abandoning me. I am not choosing to ignore them.

A couple of days later I start cleaning my room, everyone is going home for the holidays so I start to clean as something to do to keep me away from the pangs of sadness from missing my family.

I make my bed and clean under my bed, I see Draco's old hoodie and it makes me smile, we have gone so far from where we started. I shiver so I pull the hoodie over my body, months ago this hoodie was tight but it's loose and goes down to my thighs.

I start cleaning my dresser out and I find the diet pills, the thing that started this all.

I look down at the box and think how everything has changed.

I feel a flutter in my stomach and it makes me want to throw up, I haven't felt this way in a long time. I start thinking about the pills and Draco and thinking about how I should just throw these pills down the toilet to avoid temptation. I put them on a shelf by the trash to be collected by the house elfs. As I continue cleaning I spot my box of tampons on the shelf and it hits me like a ton of bricks the whole box is full and I must have gotten it months ago.

"When the fuck was the last time I had my period?" I whisper to myself before dropping the box and running out of the room.

Who can I go to? Who would have a test? I can't go to Madam Pomfrey she would owl my mother. I start walking through the halls and see the girl who is in a condition similar to one i'm afraid i'm in and I walk over to her.  
"Hey, I'm Ginny"

"Hey i'm Emily"

"Listen I don't mean to be so forward but uh you wouldn't happen to have another test would you?" I say and indicate her little bump of a belly.

"I think I might but I have muggle studies right now, come to Ravenclaw tower in an hour and I will meet you there, it will be 5 Knuts." says Emily

"That's fine, meet you there in an hour" I respond

I go back to my room and finish cleaning, the anxiety I feel inside me building I go to my little box and take out my money I have quite a bit and think to myself Draco must have been adding to it. Thank goodness he did as now she had plenty of money to pay for the test. She plucks out 5 galleons to give to Emily because a baby isn't cheap and she really was helping Ginny out.

I head to the Ravenclaw tower and see Luna talking to statue there, " Where is a place where things are hidden and not found?" Luna answers back " Your thoughts"

"You may enter" says the statue of Ravenclaw.

As Luna walks into the room Emily walks out with a small pouch in her hands. "Here you go Ginny hope the answer is what your looking for" Said Emily. Ginny grabbed the pouch and left 5 Galleons in it's place. Emily looked down at her hands and said "Why?"

" because I am sure you are going to need it." She smiles at me before giving me a wink and walking back into the room.

I go to the girls lavatory and make sure no one is in there before I sit on the toilet holding the blue stick I got from Emily.

I wait five minutes like the test tells me too. I keep looking around the room hoping and praying that isn't what I think it is and that my period is just fucked up because of the pills.

I hear the timer go off and I look down at the stick before gasping, a plus sign is looking back at me.

"Fuck I'm pregnant."


	5. Chapter 5

I'm fucked. I know it. My mother is going to kill me... Not even seventeen and pregnant...

I put the muggle pregnancy test back in the bag and put it in my pocket before walking out of the bathroom stall.

What am I going to tell Draco? He doesn't want kids right now... He just got off drugs, I just got off drugs. How do I bring a child into the world with two druggie parents? I bite my bottom lip before setting off to find Draco... The bag weighing heavy in my pocket.

I find him by our tree... The same tree I found him under when he O.D, the same tree where his heart stopped beating and I thought my world was going to end along with his.

"Hi." I whisper softly as I lay down against his chest. He rubs my arms up

This is his way of telling me he knows i'm tense and I can tell him if I want too... But how do I tell him that i'm pregnant? How do I tell him that everything we once knew was about to change.

"I- I have to tell you something.." I tell him while looking down on the ground, this isn't easy, I don't know what to say. "You can tell me anything baby, you know that." He says while tighting his grip around my stomach.

"I'm pregnant." I tell him while looking down at the ground, I cant stomach to look at his face right now, I know this is going to change everything.

He loosens his grip and all but pushes me off of him while standing up, I follow suit, still not looking at him. "Care to repeat that doll face?" He sneers at me.

"I said I'm pregnant Draco! Are you not fucking listening to me?" I yell at him. I knew he wasn't going to be happy about it, but he doesn't have to act like this...

"How the fuck are you pregnant?" He screams back. "I don't fucking know! Maybe it was all the times we fucked with out using a condom or a spell to protect us against pregnancy." I yell back, tears streaming down my face.

He sneers at me before walking away. I break down and start to cry back against the tree. "It's okay little one... Your daddy wants you, he's just scared right now." I whisper to my stomach while tears run down my face.

I stay until it becomes dark outside, Draco never came back.

I don't see him for a couple of days but when I do I can tell he's strung out on something... He looks crazy, his eyes are wide with black and blue skin covering the skin. He smells disgusting and i'm sure it's not just the pregnancy that's making me feel this way.

I want to scream out in frustration. He was doing so good... Why did he have to use again! I'm sitting in the great hall with brother and Harry while rubbing my stomach softly when I see him again.

Draco comes up to the table before standing right next to me.

"Ginny, I love you." He slurred while unconsciously swaying back and forth. My stomach turns when I smell the alcohol mixed on his usual fresh breath.

"You need help Draco! Why did you fuck up again? You were doing so good!" I yell at him, not even bothering to take this somewhere else. "Fuck Draco! We were doing so good we were just learning what healthy is! You ass!"

"You're pregnant Ginny, what the fuck did you think was going to happen?" He sneered at me. My eyes go wide when I hear a cough and I remember where I am and who I'm sitting with.

I turn my head and look at Ron who was turning from red to purple every few seconds. It didn't take long for Ron to tackle Draco to the floor. The teachers finally got them apart, Draco sneering at Ron while tugging down his robes.

"Miss Weasley, please come with me." McGonagall said while looking down at me with a grave facial expression. I take one look back at Draco who busy getting glared at by professor Snape.

* * *

"Missy Weasley, are you sure you're pregnant?" She ask as soon as we sat down in Dumbledore's office. I nod my head up and down, not trusting my voice right now.

"I see... Have you told your parents?" She keeps asking me questions, I don't want to be here, it's awkward and the phoenix bird keeps looking at me.

Finally I speak to her. "No I haven't told my parents, and no I don't want to tell them either." I all but sneer at her. I'm annoyed and it's showing.

"Since you're a minor we have to tell your parents... I'm sorry dear." I can tell she actually meant it, I don't think she would ever want to go through what i'm about to endure.

"Wait, can I write Draco a letter first?" I don't think they're going to leave me school after they find out i'm pregnant... Professor McGonagall agrees and gives me the time to write out what I want to say to Draco before using the floo network to contact my mother and father.

Mom comes in crying and hugs me as soon as she sees me. I know this is an act, she's highly pissed off that i'm pregnant, but she doesn't show it in front of the professor. Dad's face is still red and he is refusing to look at me right now. Mom tells me to go pack my bags.

When I get back to the tower no one is there making it easy to pack my bags.

I don't know how long i'll be gone so I pack enough clothes for two weeks. I go to my dresser and grab the pregnancy test along with the locket Draco gave me after he got out of the rehab he stayed in after he O.D

As I walked out of the door and go back down to the common room Ron, Harry and Hermione were sitting down on the couch. Ron stands up and hugs me, I was shocked but hugged him back.

I pull Hermione to the side and hand her the letter I wrote to Draco. "Can you please give this to him? Please." I beg her. She nods her head before pulling me into a hug and crying into my hair. I let her hold before telling her that I have to go.

I go back to my parents, my dad takes my bags and Floo's home mom and I follow.

Bill and Charlie are home... It's awkward, I haven't seen Charlie in two years. They both give me hugs and mom fusses over me asking me if I had morning sickness yet and if I knew how far along I was.

"Wait, your not mad at me?" I look at her shock is written all over my face but I don't care, she should be pissed at me, not asking if I had morning sickness yet.

She gives me a sad smile before responding. "Merlin no, my baby is finally home." she says before hugging me tightly. I don't know what's going on right now but at lease she isn't yelling.

It takes a couple of days but dad finally comes around asking me how i'm feeling and how the baby is doing. I didn't know how much I missed home, how I missed my family...

Hermione writes me a week later, giving me an update. She gave Draco the letter and how he was pulled out of school again. I cry that night while reading the letter over and over again. Charlie came into my room and held me while I cried... The next morning he didn't say anything.

Mom says we get to go find out how far along I am today and depending on how far along that is I'll be able to know if i'm having a girl or a boy.. Mom is betting it's a boy since the only time she had morning sickness was with me.

Mom, dad and Bill come. I'm nervous, what if there's something wrong? What if the drugs messed up the baby some how? All these questions are running through my mind.

We get called back and nurse runs through some questions and ask me if there was any drug use while I was pregnant. I tell her the truth about the muggle drugs and the muggle diet pills. She just smiles at me and writes the information down. The doctor comes in next and tells me to lift up my shirt and points his wand at my stomach and a screen pops up against the wall.

You can see the baby, it's little nose and mouth. I cry when I see it.

The doctor tells me it's a girl, i'm five months along and everything looks healthy. He informs me to stay off the muggle drugs because it can hurt the baby and that i'll start to show more in a couple of weeks.

Finally my clothes get to small for me and mom and I go shopping. I'm up to a size 3, I thought it would be weird to get bigger again but it doesn't because I know my baby is growing inside of me. I get new tops that shows off my baby bump and some new flats.

After i'm home for a month and i'm six months along mom says I can go back to school if I want or wait until I give birth to the baby. It stops me, do I really want to go back to school? It would only be for two months before everyone comes home for the summer. I tell her yes and pack my bags.

It was weird coming back. Everyone would stop and stare at me... But I held my head up high and didn't let the looks bother me. Draco is back. He looks clean and alot healthier than he did the last time I saw him.

He won't talk to me, but he keeps sending me looks, I know he's worried about me and the baby... But I won't talk to him... Not yet.

Two weeks later Draco comes up to me while i'm sitting under the tree... Our tree.

"I'm sorry Ginny... I really am. It was selfish of me to do the drugs again. I really want to be apart of the babies life." He tells me while hugging me as tightly as he can with out hurting the baby. "I don't know if I can trust you anymore." I tell him while holding back a sob, I blame the pregnancy. He looks at me before telling me they cleaned out his room and he has no way of getting any type of drug.

"My father isn't happy that we're having a baby... But he'll come around to it." He tells me. I know he wants to apart of our life's but it's hard to trust him to make the right choices.

In the end we get back together and he cries when I tell him we're having a girl.

A month passes and he hasn't left my side. He is still clean and healthy looking. He keeps his hands on top of the baby bump whenever we're close enough to each other to do it.

I keep getting bigger and my back hurts but I won't take anything for it. I don't want to hurt the baby...

Draco and I finally chose a name for the name: Adabella Elizabeth Malfoy.

It's finally Summer time and Draco doesn't want to leave my side. We ride back together on the train alone and he tells me that he's going to be a flat and I can do whatever I feel like doing to the baby room.

When we get off the train mom and dad are waiting, standing with them is Fred and George. I smile at them before turning back to Draco and giving him a kiss, promising to write him.

A couple of days later I get a letter from Draco letting me know that he has a flat and it's set up and all that is waiting to be done is the baby room. I smile at the letter before looking down at my stomach.

I ask mom if I can go see the flat, she wants to say no but doesn't when she sees how happy I look. I go and see it. It was the perfect size, 3 bedroom flat, two bedrooms and one office. Since it was in Hogsmeade he told I could stay there on the weekends.

"Oh Draco, it's wonderful... But there not going to let me stay here on the weekends." I tell him while biting my bottom lip and rubbing the bump on my stomach.

"They will if we get married." He tells me before pulling out a little black box out of his pocket and gets down on one knee before taking my hand into his.

"Ginevra Molly Weasley, will you marry me?" I'm shocked and he looks hopeful. "yes." I tell him, i'm nervous... But this is the right thing to do, for myself and the baby.

He slides the ring onto my finger and it burns for a second. I look at him questionably. "Why did it burn when you put it on?" Draco's face goes a little pink before telling me the only way to get the ring off my finger is for him to remove it himself. I'm a little pissed he did that... But I don't show it. We're getting married and i'm not seventeen yet.

I write my mom and tell her... She's not happy but tells me I can spend the night. We stay up decorating the room and around 3 in the morning we fall asleep, my hand on his chest.

The next morning there's a letter from my mother telling us to come home and that we will talk about the marriage then. Draco makes sure to wear a long sleeve shirt before we floo over.

Mom and dad are sitting at the table when we get there. Mom gets up and gives me a hug and dad shakes Draco's hand.

"Ginny dear, we were talking and we think it would be for the best if you got married right away and not after the baby is born... I know you wanted a big wedding but I think it might be for the best to have a small one now and a bigger one later on." mom tells me while looking at my face for signs of tears.

It threw me off... I didn't think they would want us to get married right now.

Draco agrees and I go along with it. The date is set and the wedding will be next month.. In my almost nine of pregnancy. A month before I turn 17.

Mom and I go shopping for a wedding dress and I find one that I actually like. It's white and strapless and sits on my baby bump perfectly. We buy it and mom tells me I don't have to worry about anything else.

A month passes and everything I own is now at Draco's flat... No our flat. The wedding takes place out side of the barrow and only 20 people showed up, Draco's parents included. After we're married and the small after party is over we go back home and are finally able to together again.

A week later my water broke.

* * *

(This is pictures for the dress, the ring, and the baby room...)

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I know this seems rushed.. But the next chapter is going to along longer... Only a couple of chapters are left!


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